The longer I live, the more I start to think that maybe the “intelligent life” are the creatures frolicking in the woods, not knowing what “fascism” or “rent money” means.

I was coming in here to respond “uhhhh no” but it being meat makes sense, because I don’t eat it

🤯 that is fucking incredible

I wonder if part of it is that you get a procedure done and you love the results, and it wasn’t actually as scary as you thought it was. So then you do another, and another, and another. And then when someone goes wrong, you get caught in a trap of trying to “fix it” and it goes downhill from there.

Probably depends a fair but on what else you eat with it. Like how drinking water doesn’t help but milk does.

If they’re not selling your data, they have to get paid somehow. Pay for the premium subscription.

Just guillotines

Calling a partner who cheats an abuser is quite the leap.

There are remorseless serial cheaters for sure, and that is abusive and cruel behavior. There are also people who cheat because they feel like their needs aren’t being meet and haven’t figured out how to communicate that. And when that happens, there’s three options: figure your shit out, learn how to communicate, and rebuild trust; figure your shit out, learn to communicate, and accept if your partner isn’t interested in staying with you; or don’t take accountability. I don’t think any of those make them “abusers,” even the last one which is quite shitty. It makes them a flawed human and someone who shouldn’t try to be with someone until they figure out how to be better.

Edit to add, I was pondering more and there is a 4th option. I was thinking “don’t take accountability and get dumped.” But there is also “don’t take accountability and your partner stays with you,” and I would agree that that is abusive.

Which I would argue matters less when it’s so easy to move to a different “country” and still participate in everything with little meaningful difference.

You’re lookin at it

You can also block entire instances.

I don’t want to turn off NSFW since there’s plenty non-porn NSFW but every time I go on all I block time of porn communities and if I see a bunch coming from the same instance I’ll block the whole thing. Makes it so I can actually find new communities on all.

There’s a lot of merit in the phrase “the truth will set you free.” You can tear down the dam and drain the sea of lies. But when I say the truth, I mean all of it. Your wife has a right to know the whole truth, down to the last detail. To her, your life has to be an open book. She needs to be able to ask you anything and know that you will be honest with her, even if it’s something she’ll be hurt by. In fact, it’s ok to preface answers with something like, "I’m afraid my answer is going to be hurtful but if you really want to know I will tell you.

I’m not disagreeing with you, but this should start with asking your wife if she wants to know all the details, if there’s any hard lines, if she wants specificities or an outline, or if she’d rather not know it reassess later.

Why did you cheat Because you were angry with your wife? Because you like the other woman?

These are far from the only two reasons. Some people cheat because they are unhappy with their lives generally, outside of a partner, and don’t know why. Some people have impulse control issues. Substance abuse. These are not excuses, but explanations.

Couple’s therapy is often recommended after infidelity. I think it’s far more important for the person who cheated to start with individual therapy. If you don’t change your behavior you can’t rebuild trust.

No…?

I mean I’m not a genius or anything but I know some things about some things. When I can help someone with those things or just shoot the shit about cool things I know, it makes me feel good.

I gave up on screen protectors because they kept cracking when I’d drop the phone. Without the protector, the screen itself doesn’t crack. Adding a screen protector just gives me an extra cracked layer on top of what would otherwise be fine anyway.

Have you watched the episode of Black Mirror “Be Right Back”?

Drinking. It’s one of the more damaging drugs but it’s completely normalized because it’s legal. Even people who don’t have drinking problems per se, Ares still harming their health way more than they realize.

reduced the size of the roads just for them

Reducing the size of roads actually makes it better for everyone. It reduces the rate of traffic fatalities by reducing speed. It’s especially important for pedestrians and anyone in a car that’s not a giant fucking truck or SUV.

I am so sorry, I can’t imagine how devastating that must have been. You didn’t fail anything, you did the best you could to help someone who had already made up their mind. I hope you find some help and services.

My friend-breakups have been a thousand times more devastating than any romantic breakup.